lriv
10-10-2005, 07:20 AM
A bright, young, fresh-out-of-school auditor just joined the IRS, excited to
begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or WorldCom
guys. Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when
his assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi
clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a
little fun with the Rabbi.
"Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
"Yes," answered the Rabbi.
"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.
"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we
have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then,
they send us a free box of candles."
"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question
actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious
way..."Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the
crumbs from the matzo?"
"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs
from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the
manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."
"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi. "Well,
Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the
circumcisions?"
"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up
all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the
I.R.S."
"The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.
"Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, " the I.R.S. " ..and about once a year, they
send us a little prick like you."
begin tracking down high-powered offenders-just as the Enron or WorldCom
guys. Anxious for his first high-powered audit, he was a bit dismayed when
his assignment was to audit a Rabbi.
Looking over the books and taxes were pretty straight forward, and the Rabbi
clearly very frugal, so he thought he'd make his day interesting by having a
little fun with the Rabbi.
"Rabbi," he said, "I noticed that you buy a lot of candles."
"Yes," answered the Rabbi.
"Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.
"A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up and when we
have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then,
they send us a free box of candles."
"Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his unusual question
actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd go on, in his obnoxious
way..."Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do with the
crumbs from the matzo?"
"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up all the crumbs
from the matzo and when we have enough, we send them in a box back to the
manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."
"Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi. "Well,
Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the
circumcisions?"
"Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up
all the foreskins, and when we have enough we actually send them to the
I.R.S."
"The I.R.S.?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.
"Ahh, yes," replied the Rabbi, " the I.R.S. " ..and about once a year, they
send us a little prick like you."