i got the call i've have not been looking forward to .i have togo pick up my mothers remains and i'm already starting to loose it.i'm gonna go off the deep end with no way out.i've got no friends or family in this town.i havent heard a single word from my so called cousins..and now i have this todo.i asked my doc for some tranquilizers to help me out.he wont he just refilled my pain killers.would'nt even write me for some marinol..i am so dam depressed no funds no meds nothing but painkillers that are starting to give me bad stomach aches from taking them on a empty stomach, no appetite, .
i feel like a caged animal ready to run the moment some one opens the cage.
i searched my pipes,bongs,not even a smige of resin to dull my feelings.
i wish i could just vanish into nothing..its driving me crazy,my depression is so bad i totally blanked out on my little starts that they died on me to...
i just hope i dont loose it right in the funeral home.time to go and bring her home........................................... tat