My Remembrance Day

[Kathy]

Today is the 7th anniversary of my husband's death from cancer. Every year on this day I make my pilgrimage to his memorial which I created at the Aeolian Hall where I donated his much loved grand piano. The piano is in a teaching room in the music school and there is a plaque on the wall that memorializes Michael, and "The Spirit of the Music".

I scattered his ashes and did nothing with graveyards. Music was Michaels's life and I wanted his memory to live among musicians who would probably never know his name. So the memorial at the performance hall and music studio was right.

What saddens me, other than the natural grief of loss of a fine man and friend, is that neither my son, nor his best friend, have
ever visited that memorial, nor spent a minute of this day with me. I know all about their pain and how men deal with grief.
The loss of the courage of these men he loved causes deeper grief and loss for me.

I will go later and buy some flowers and go and sit in that room and touch the places on the piano where his rings scratched the board. I wont feel any closer to him or think his death had any more sense that it did.

I woke up this morning not thinking about what day it was and was hit by a cannonball of unexpected grief as my husband's presence and then loss hit me as if it had happened today. Oh yes, it is my Remembrance Day, I had to remind myself.

Michael Lewis - October 15 1949 - November 11 2003

At the end of every one of his shows, he said "Take care of each other." Please do.

[micah]

Thanks for sharing Kathy. The things you have done in his memory he would be proud. Take care .. Mike

[Gary Andrew Pallister]

Kathy,we are with you.Thanx fer sharing

[Mamahawk6]

A baby grand WOW Kathy just think of the music that still comes from the instrument through tiny fingers that will hit those ivories. Music is the one thing that can JOIN us ALL, he was a good man to have You too Lady just think how You chose each other and the love that was felt in those ivories.
Children in my opinion don't share grief the same as we do...
When Our children's grandfather had passed, we chose to take our kids by themselves as this was their first time dealing with death and the sudden loss. We gathered and the children were allowed to go into the parlour where Mr. Hawkins was in a coffin. There was the usual whispering but one of the boys had started an agrument over the fact that their grandfather had no legs. Upon hearing this I suggested that they be allowed to view Grandpa on the whole and the Attendant was quickly asked to open coffin revealing everything inside. We heard "I told Ya he had legs" and the rest I reckon was answered in the memories they now share of their Grandfather.
Much love
Mama

[skunk-mad]

your right men are not very good with handling there feelings or grief for that matter but what you did my creating this memorial will help lot,s of young musicians to learn there craft which is a great thing.everytime the piano is played im sure your husband is looking down smiling.

take care kathy

skunk-mad.

[Kathy]

Thanks friends. Son and I did well and I sent him a card telling me he is a fine young man. He will shake it to make sure he is not missing the invisible money I didnt include, lol.

[Rickkus]

Kathy there's no sense to cancer. It's absurd. It's a lottery.

It's like our memories are there to soothe us when they're gone - and bring us to tears - reminding us that we're here for a brief time.

Best wishes.